Jamie Carroll: Journal

FOR MORE ON WHO RON PAUL IS AND WHY WE SHOULD SUPPORT AND VOTE FOR HIM PLEASE VISIT www.campaignforliberty.com

I saw John Mayer in concert for the first time last night in Greensboro, NC. I have always been a fan and I have been impressed at his growth musically since he began.

Most people know John from his Radio/Popular Hit Songs (which I would love to be known for as well).
However, there is SO very much more to this man as a Musician and a person.
I experienced many different emotions last night during the performance.
Resentment, Regret, Amazement, Happiness, Sadness and ultimate Humility.
It’s not every day that an artist is PERFECT in every area of the craft. In my opinion, John is.
His lyrics are meaningful, honest, true and detailed. His voice is soft, yet rough and haunting.
His Guitar Playing? That is something you MUST not only hear recorded, but see with your eyes in person.
I have been playing Guitar since I was 15 years old and to be honest I have come to a halt on the learning scale for now due to playing out so much. I play the same songs and the same chords night after night.
Last night I resented Mayer for a moment while wishing I had made better decisions in my younger life that may could have led me down a different path musically and now at age 35 (with him only being two years younger than I) and just possibly I could be on his stage as well.
I regretted for a moment following immature dreams instead of being more patient and waiting on better things to come.
THEN the Resentment and Regret quickly disappeared with the Amazement I felt while shedding tears a few times during his concert. I realized again that even my bad decisions had a part in not only making me WHO I am, but brought me to where I am (happier than ever really even without being a full time millionaire musician). I felt happiness while holding my wife’s hand and watching her dance to John’s music. I am a truly blessed man. I felt sad a few times while listening to his Guitar Solo’s as the “gently wept” throughout the Coliseum. Watching those crazy “guitar faces” that Mayer is known for and realizing that he, like myself does not just play, but FEELS every moment of his performance. All of those emotions led to ultimate Musical Humility.
Week after week I receive emails and messages regarding my own performances. People telling me they are amazed at my “talent” and how my songs touch their lives in personal ways. THAT is what I am about musically. The thing I realize, however is that I have MUCH to learn and while listening to John sing and play I realized that I continue to desire being a REAL Songwriter and Performer, passionately delivering each lyric from personal experience and each feeble, humble, ignorant note that I play in hopes of reaching ALL of our souls.
Needless to say I am in NO position to criticize Mr. Mayer in any area. Rather I praise his Heaven sent gift and I am inspired to go further than I ever have before. I think a good place to begin is realizing my strengths and weaknesses such as the fact I am not that good of a Guitarist and would love to be far better, but I do hold tremendous Vocal strength and SOUL in every word and note sung. Also I write much like Mayer does being honest and unwilling to bow to any “industry standard” or “musical opinions”. So what do I do now? I bathe in each simple Chord that I do know and sing even louder and with more passion. Maybe, just maybe I will meet more musicians who are better players than I am and we will eventually be on the same stage adding what we are all individually strong at to the final mix of every song.
I want to finish my new record more than ever. Doug Davis is my current Producer and I truly believe could be a musical “soul mate” in and out of the Studio. We plan to work more as soon as possible to finish the Broken, Beautiful Recording and release it without rush.
I have met some extremely talented musicians in the Winston Salem area who have all offered to help in some way and I am grateful. Only time and patience will tell us who we will team up with, but I am more open minded than ever to find just the “RIGHT” people to fall in love with the music and stories I write and eventually help me create this and SHARE it from a CONCERT STAGE.
There’s no room for jealously or rock star mentality (as many of us have portrayed in the past). There is only room for LIFE and Music to collide and me to wait on that new stage and studio FAMILY that I will proudly display under the banner of “Jamie Carroll and Letters From Jean”.
Thank you John Mayer for EVERYTHING. Thank you friends and family for loving me while I continue to seek out my place in this world musically and spiritually.
May we continue to LOVE and ACCEPT all people and sing some songs along the way.
Moving forward as always,
J.

I just wanted to thank everyone for the wonderful support you continue to give me and the encouragement that keeps me going. I am so very thankful for the Venues that continue to call me back and have helped me to feed my family by playing music for you all night after night. Someday the new Record will FINALLY be complete and I will gear up a new "Live Band" to so a series of ALL ORIGINAL performances and when that happens I hope you will ALL attend! I will keep you posted. For now please continue to tell you facebook, myspace and email friends about my website and remember you can download my older music at itunes, napster, amazon and many other download stations online. This helps me MORE than you know.

Thanks again and I hope you are all living in peace and personal happiness :)

Jamie

So this is the new year? Well then, let us all become new :)

Be WHO you are and NOT what some expect you to be.

Enjoy family, friends and good music!

Take time to hug or kiss you pets :)

DO something random and nice for a complete stranger daily.

Get out of whatever box you might be in and think out loud!

Be willing to admit ignorance and mistakes.

Be willing to learn about others and the differences we all have in this big world.

As always, please be SLOW to judge another and keep seeking...

Love, love, love...

Jamie Carroll
Jan, 1st 2010

Recently I learned of a long time friend who was almost murdered by her abusive husband. My friend is an amazing artist and her husband (in a angered frenzy) slashed many of the paintings in her gallery with a knife and then came after her. Though injured and scared she survived and he was locked away. Somehow she has been able to regain her strength, heal and now she speaks out against domestic violence and takes her damaged gallery on the road for all to see. One painting in particular was of a beautiful woman in black and white. My friend said to me, "though she is broken she is STILL beautiful". This is when my newest song and the title of the record we are currently recording came to me in a matter of hours. I stayed up most of that night many times breaking into tears while writing my new song "Broken, Beautiful". Below is a copy of the painting and a link to her website. I encourage all of us to be envolved and be aware of domestic violence. Thanks for the support and thank you Michelle for the humble inspiration. I will be posting the song very soon for you all to hear and it will also be included on the new record.

www.beavoicearts.com


broken, beautiful
words/music: jamie carroll, 2009

broken, beautiful, black and white

as if painted on broken ice

words in darkness close behind

though your sunlit hair

forever shines in my eyes

oh, they forever shine



tattered canvas torn apart

blade of madness razor sharp

no pretending with those scars

now the world can see who it is you truly are

how did it go this far?



broken, beautiful rise again

in the gallery with your friends

tell your story, break our hearts

some see failure, we see art in your eyes

oh, they forever shine

never left behind

*Words and Music COPYRIGHT 2009, Jamie Carroll Music.

Channel 12 News Interview:
http://www.wxii12.com/news/22318095/detail.html

A few weeks ago I went to see Wilco perform in Aseville, NC with my friends and fellow
musicians Jerry Chapman and Doug Davis.

I heard about Wilco a few years ago through another Singer/Songwriter I have much
respect for named Bill Mallonee (of Vigilantes of Love).

The first Wilco recording I purchased was the "Sky Blue Sky" record.

At first listen I was not a fan, but something drew me back to the record from
beginning to end time and time again until it soon became the ONLY record I listened
to for months. I seriously could not stray from the music I was hearing.

The song writing was pure, simple and addicting. Lead Singer, Jeff Tweedy does not
have the vocal chords of Steve Perry, nor does he need it. His humble, yet
passionate vocal method is captivating to me.

Last night's concert could possibly be the best Live show I have ever seen and heard.

All 6 members of this band bring something like magic to the studio and the stage.
The energy and control amazes me. The ballads are sweet and the rock songs are
energetic and extremely unpredictable. Just when you think they might play a "pop
song" they collectively create the most beautiful noise I have ever heard.

There have been several changes in the band lineup of Wilco since their formation,
however the best yet is the current band. For more on Wilco's history, please
research online at Wikipedia.com or google.

Nels Cline is the lead guitarist/multi instrument player (I should enter here that
all members of Wilco play multiple intruments). Nels is more than a guitarist. I
dare say one of the best and most inventive/creative players... EVER. From Jazz to
folk to real country to "Beatle Like" rock n roll this guy is not just there to play
three chords and say goodnight. He is probably my new guitar hero.

Glenn Kotch, the drummer wants his drums to sound real...you know, like drums
instead of over processed "modern rock" drums that drown out the importance of the
songs. He is a part of his drum kit. He dances effortless with the drum beats and
plays exactly what needs to be played and nothing more or less. He along with the
other members of the band also incorporate many different percussion sounds as the
concert/songs move forward. Shakers, Tambourines and other noise makers I have
never seen before.

I could go on in detail about the rest of the band, but there would not be enough
paper to pen my amusement at Wilco.

If you love music, PLEASE introduce yourself to Jeff Tweedy and the Wilco guys. I
suggest starting with "Sky blue sky" as I did. You must remember to give it time.
Each song. From beginning to end. I assure you that you will truly be amazed.
After that record I suggest getting "Kicking Television" which is a Concert
recording (double disc) that spans their early material as well as the current
songs. Another personal favorite is a record called "Being There".

No matter where you start, please just start some Wilco flowing through your speakers soon.

I have not had much to say lately (which is weird if you know me personally).

Mostly all is going well as I work my day job, play nightly and weekend venues in
the local area and look forward to spending every possible moment with my sons every
other weekend.



Jamie Lynn and I were married on April 25th and went on a Cruise (thanks to gracious
family and friends!). We had never been on a cruise before and it was amazing. My
jeans fit at the beginning of the trip and I had the top button undone on the flight
home!



My oldest son Micah not only made the honor roll for the third year in a row, but is
also turning out to be a awesome little baseball player! I have enjoyed watching
his games and practices and it brings back memories from when I played as a child.

My youngest son Ethan is a star student as well and I am more than proud. They were
both in our wedding and were such little men dressed in their tuxedos! Micah kept
saying, "Daddy, I'm so glad we're married now and are a family". Ethan kept saying,
"Daddy, it's hot out here...is it time to eat yet?" LOL



All of the family and friends that supported us at the wedding was overwhelming.

I was reminded of all the love and kindness I have been shown through the years.

From money loaned, to groceries purchased to having a roof over my head and a pillow
to rest on at night... I am truly thankful.



Moving forward and continuing to let the past remain where it is, I am now working
on my new CD as well. I am taking my time (like never before) and writing new songs
as well as re-writing a few older ones to bring them to the "digital light of day"
like I always dreamed they would be heard.

Producer, Doug Davis at Flytrap Studio has been at the wheel and has been very
patient with me as well as truly understood my vision and direction with the
recording sessions thus far. He is amazing. Check his music out on itunes.



I am performing quiet regularly at several of the J. Butler's locations in
Lewisville, Greensboro and High Point and I continue to enjoy the company and the
treatment I receive from the staff and management. Great food, great drinks and
nice people. You can't even find that at most American Churches these days!
Hahahaha.



I am also playing many Wednesday nights at a small place called "Moxie's" in
downtown Mocksville, NC. With a first glance and only a back door entrance you may
think "what kind of place is that?" - lol, but I was welcomed with smiles and much
gratitude and again met some very nice and hospitable people.



That's the update for now folks. Email anytime with questions and complaints (I
have fun with those). Until we meet somewhere out there remember that all people
don't see things the same way. Try to be understanding and patient with those who
see and understand differently from us. Life can be too short for us to scramble
around trying to change others when we could simply allow them to find any needed
change on their own. As I have said many times, "Not everything that appears broken
to you...truly is."



Jamie

We just got home from the concert tonight and I can't get it all out of my head.

I was personally there to see my favorite Rock/Country Band "Little Big Town", but Carrie Underwood was amazing as well.

Our friend Wanda won some backstage passes and we got to meet Little Big Town after their show.




They were not only the most humble and polite people, but truly seemed to care about the people shaking their hands.

I brought one of my Guitars for them to autograph and I also gave them one of my CD's.

Philip said, "Thanks for the music...isn't it funny how God brings people together?"

I replied, "yeah, and thank YOU for the music as well".

We went back to our seats and Carrie Underwood began her concert.

Her band... was incredible.

I heard NOTHING "country" about them. This was a Rock show at it's best.

After she belted out her #1 hits (something I still don't have, lol) I turned to Jamie Lynn and said "I knew she was good, but this is amazing. This girl can SING."

Then as if I was not already blown away... I noticed the familiar three chords of a certain song beginning... and a certain electric guitar riff... yep.... Carrie Underwood was performing "Paradise City" by one of my all time favorites "Guns n Roses"!!!

What a way to end a show.

So I wanted to let all my readers/fans know that if you still don't know who either of these artists are... GO BUY THEIR RECORDS.

Oh- And one more thing.

I have lied to myself and all of you... yeah, really....

I have been saying that "I don't care if I never make it in the music business." Well, I do care. More than ever.... I care.

When?

Who knows.

Thanks to you all.

J.

“Beautiful Boy”
No one will ever see what I see


Some people complained about his crying all night when he was a newborn baby.
I have to admit those many sleepless nights…many I said… were very challenging.

There were times when I would cradle him and dance him around the living room while listening to The Cure’s Disintegration Record until he was asleep again. There were also times when I had lost so much sleep that I broke into tears and called my mother asking her to please come get him for one night so I could try to collapse into a chance to actually rest. Mom’s back yard was my front yard (not a strange thing in Wilkes County, NC) so she was close.

As time went on and my first born son’s mother and I learned to become friends for his sake I quickly realized that she and I were the only ones that would ever see the potential he has and the beauty in his personality. Of all the hard days that parents will have I would still not change a thing about my son.

There were some who would rather have him tied to a chair, doped up on medicine to keep him from talking so much or being so energetic rather than spending quality time with him and taking him to a park to make up a game called “Micah, run from here to the tree as many times as you can before I count to 100!!!”.

That’s all he wanted. Time. Attention.

He did not ask for what his mother and I created in our divorce. In fact the only thing he ever asked for was maybe more cookies!

In separation and divorce there is never much sunshine until months and most times years have passed with a lot of grace, forgiveness, allowance and understanding flowing under and away from “the bridge”.

I am thankful for the measures that Micah’s mother and I have taken to become friends for our son’s ultimate benefit. After all if we are going to be good parents and try to make his life worthwhile, he needs to be nothing less than first. Our needs and wants mean nothing until his have been met.

Some people would be angered by my son’s never ending questions. Not me. If he ever stops asking questions, that’s when I will be concerned.

Some were bothered by me lying down with him at night to say our prayers and hold him until he fell asleep. Not me, now that he’s almost 9 he does not really want me to do that anymore, lol, so I am glad I did while he was younger.

Some were angered at the way I tried to remain friendly with his mother. Why hold grudges and promote hostility? We ALL make bad choices and some times we manage to make good ones. We can learn from both. We should grow from both.

There is a movie called “Mr. Holland’s Opus” starring Richard Dryfus. It came out in the 90’s I believe. That movie touched me deeply as it showed the struggling relationship between a father and son. My son does not have any kind of “handicap” as the boy in the movie did, however the patience that the Father showed was the pathway to an unconditional love that EVERY parent should have.

My daily visit to Starbuck’s have also drawn my attention to a new book called “Beautiful Boy” which is about a Father’s struggle with his son’s drug addiction.
Again, my 8 year old is not an addict, however this story is about another Father’s unconditional guidance, support and love. I plan to read it soon.

The title “Beautiful Boy” comes from a song by the immortal songwriter, John Lennon.
Listen to it. It was about his son.

Both of my sons, Micah and Ethan are beautiful to me.



I hate… daily…hate the fact that we are together only every other weekend, holiday’s, etc. I think about them every minute it seams. I call them weekly. I used to call daily, but they are too busy with sponge bob and hot wheels to talk to Dad right now! Ha-ha.



Before I was a parent there were many things that I did and viewed differently.
One was that spoiled brat, crying baby in a restaurant that I always made the judgment “that kid needs an ass busting… does that mom not teach that child anything? If that was my child, I would put the fear of god in them… blah- blah- blah….

Like I knew what was best for someone else’s child. What an arrogant, selfish thing to believe about myself.

Now when I hear people say, “I’ll tell you what will straighten that boy out…” I cringe and shake my head in disbelief of the demonstration of self-righteousness that in standing before me. We always know what’s best for someone else don’t we? We always know that what worked for us will certainly work wonders for others. Why are we so stupid? Why do we think this way?

I love my son just the way he is. There will be a day in the future when the things that sometimes get on our nerves will be things we miss about him. We will laugh about the things that once made us mad.

There are some who would say, “he needs medication” for his energetic, bouncy personality. How easy that would make it on you huh? Then you would not have to take the time he is actually asking for to go outside and ride bikes, play ball and run.

That… is true medication.

Jamie

I have been writing and re-writing for my next full length, Nationally Released CD for over a year now. I am now in the final days of the lyrical madness that I call a blessing.
Mostly saturated with brand new songs and including a few “re-dos” that will finally be heard in the power and glory I originally imagined them in.

I want a Classic record. A timeless record. I don’t recognize “style and genre” because I have no intentions of “making it” or being what “they” are looking for.
I want strong vocal melodies and harmony. I want acoustic guitars to not be buried in the mix under a fake compression. I want electric guitars to pierce through with a classic/modern sound as if Tom Petty collided with Jars Of Clay.

Some producers out there want to change so many of the words I write that it would make my songs… not my songs. This can be good for many and trust me I need a good producer, but not one that is only interested in adding one line to a two year old song in order to obtain Publishing credit if and when I ever finally get paid for this work.

I want to have a lot of input and suggestion in this recording. I am no producer, however I hear so many parts and so many sounds I would like to hear that was birthed in my heart, mind and soul and then re-born in the studio by the players, the producer and myself.

I want this record to sound like it is the last one I will ever record.
A message and declaration to all my friends, family and my children of who I am and where I have been as well as my questions about the same.

Ghostly chorus lines that get stuck in our heads, Piano in and out in most of the songs, Strings and smooth, yet punchy Bass lines. Acoustic Guitar Driven, yet a strong presence of Electric Guitar echoes, delays and classic distortions to fill the spaces.

With all that being said at the end of the day I don’t care if the song is 3 minutes or 8 minutes long – as long as the song begins and ends when and where it is destined to.
I have been listening a lot lately to a group called One Republic and other than their notorious pop hit “apologize” the rest of the record is not only better than that song, but also clear and powerful from beginning to end. When music brings tears and cold chills… I know it’s good.

That’s all I want to give people. Songs that actually have substance and meaning. Even if I am overly poetic at times each line of every song leads to the moral or outcome of the story.

Extra Note to readers: Some of my favorites for listening – One Republic, Cold Play, Jars of Clay, Howie Day, U2, Led Zeppelin, The Beatles, Counting Crows, Darrel Scott, Bill Mallonee,Don Henley/Eagles, Fleetwood Mac, Foo Fighters, Goo Goo Dolls, Mellencamp, Switchfoot, Little Big Town, Michael Gungor Band, Queen, Tom Petty, Travis, Wallflowers, Early Bon Jovi, Journey and last but certainly not least, Wilco.

A lot of people like to watch me use the “Loop Station” in my Acoustic shows.
It is the small red, electric box at my feet that I step on several times while playing songs like “Music Man, At your feet, etc” to record parts and play them back while I play even more parts.

I confess my un-originality in this process, but then again nothing in this world is original huh? I got the idea from watching Howie Day do it in concert. I was blown away and said “I got to get one of those!”.

So I have been learning as I go with the Boss RC20 Loop Station and I love it!
However, sometimes… it does not work just the way I need it to.

The other night at Whiskey River while performing the song Music Man – the loop station cut out and left me with NO sound! Thank God for Keary Reid being behind the keyboard as I laid my guitar down on the stage and began singing with no music I could hear his Piano sneaking in behind me… on a song he has heard me do hundreds of times… yet he has NEVER played! He saved the show! Thanks Keary!

Then last night at Winston Salem Church of God/Prophecy my loop station started going out on the very FIRST song! Talk about having to cover my tracks, lol. Finally about middle way through last night’s concert – the loop station gave its last performance… and left me with no choice but to finish the concert – unplugged.

It gave me about 4 years of it’s company and now I am sure to hit EBAY for a new one!

So why am I writing?

Looking down at my feet at all those cables, lights and effects pedals I thought to myself “wow, this is all fun and it sounds good… but… why do we complicate things so much? Learn to depend on an electronic piece of equipment…and then when it is gone… we are lost! Lol

That is why I don’t get upset about equipment problems. No matter what happens during a show… you got to keep going. Never stop… just live in your human moment of accidental failure, lol and keep the show going!

Hmm… good advice for my crybaby nature during the 40 hr, day job work week too I think?

In search of another loop station,

Jamie

I left home at 4:30 am… this morning in route to Charlotte, NC to be interviewed by Ken, the morning DJ at 96.9 The Kat for the “Next Big Star” Contest that I was selected as a finalist in this week. I perform tomorrow night at Whiskey River (owned by Dale Earnhardt, JR) with my band of friends, Keary Reid, Joel Davis and Marshall Jones and IF we win, we will open for Kenny Chesney on August 21st at The Verizon Wireless Amphitheater in Charlotte!

Ken was great and very welcoming. The interview was quick and painless (thanks Ken, lol). He played a clip of “I don’t wanna know” and asked me a few questions.

I had the chance to drink down a Sugar Free Red Bull on the way so I felt pretty awake and alert (for those of you who know me that’s an accomplishment!)

On the way back to Winston Salem I prayed and actually turned on my Kenny Chesney Playlist on my IPOD. To be totally honest, I was never a fan until several years ago when I heard a song called “some people change”. That song brought tears to my eyes as it told another story about my life! Since then I opened up to Chesney’s music and have been spiritually and emotionally moved many times at the songs he chooses and/or writes. I write songs about real life, every day people, places and my beliefs and/or disbeliefs. Kenny does a great job of this as well and his music has reached millions as a result.



On behalf of myself and this “band of gypsies” that will perform with me tomorrow night I want to say THANK YOU to 96.9, The Next Big Star, Whiskey River and all of the other contestants! We are truly humbled to be a part of something so awesome and win or lose we consider it all a blessing to have the chance to do this!

I hope to see a lot of familiar and new faces tomorrow night.



I also hope to shake Kenny’s hand on August 21st!

Thanks again for all the support.

Encourage someone today.

Jamie

My favorite color is Clear.

Clear allows me to see other colors and their beauty without blemish.

In Art, everything begins with Clear. It may become white, black, red, etc but it begins with nothing… accept clear.

In humanity, we have been taught that there are different “races” or “colors” and throughout history there have been many crimes due to this teaching of being less or being more due to “race and color”.

I believe there are certainly different “cultures”, but I do not believe in different “colors”.

I believe only in Clear.

All of humanity, with our skin began with Clear… nothing.

Then, depending on where we were born geographically and what our “family heritage and culture” are is how we end up with certain skin “color” or “pigmentation”.

So, all these years of complete ignorance and flat out stupidity leading to crimes of hate directed to any “color” truly leaves my heart broken and my prayers lifted up for a change like never before.

A change of heart and attitude that leads to more action than ever before.

May we all see the Clear.

May we all realize that human beings are the same, regardless of our “color, heritage and cultures”.

I am not a scholar… trust me… I am not… I do know that there is no such thing as “white, black, yellow and red” when it comes to skin tone… only shades of Clear.

May we focus on the Clear.

My so-called closing leads me to a thought: I love to see people with their hair dyed different colors. Especially multi colors. I think this is a direct result of seeing it all for what it truly is…. “Clear”.

I pray my children learn to treat all people with respect and see our “difference of skin tone” as Art and beauty.

I pray for truth and forgiveness to be shown to anyone who is raised in a family or religion that teaches hatred towards other people at all.

God help us all see THE COLOR CLEAR.

I welcome any and all hate mail due to this entry to be directed to my personal email address.


J.

Last saturday I took my sons to a park to play. When we arrived there was a man with his little girl, maybe 5 or 6 years old at the most and another man, maybe his friend or brother parked in a van beside us in the parking lot.
When I opened my car door I quickly heard the profane words of the other man talking to the little girl's Dad. General conversation really, yet VERY vulgar. Words that no child should have to hear especially from their parent or relative. I rushed my boys out of the car and said "hey, how's it going?" to the man to which he replied "not too good...". My boys and I walked to the swings and played there for awhile. Shortly after we started playing the two men and the little girl came over closer to where we were and I overheard the little girl ask her Dad a question. He looked down at her and in a mean, loud voice said something so horrible I almost cried. The vulgar words he used and the tone of voice was enough to make me leave the park with my kids. On the way out my oldest son asked me "daddy, why was that man being so mean to his little girl?". I really did not know how to answer him so I said it this way: "Son, sometimes there is trash on the playground and it needs to be picked up so the playground can be clean and pretty again. Hopefully one day that little girl's daddy will let God pick up the trash in his life". This answer seamed to be ok with him.
How can someone be so cruel and harsh to a child? Trash on the playground... let's all start picking up after ourselves.

Allow me to quote Bill Mallonee as I do so often...
"All of these places I intended to visit, somewhere I got lost and became a permanent resident..."

The past 5 or more years for me have been nothing less than your own story I am sure... Good choices and bad. Rainy days and Sunshine. Smiles and frowns. Peace and anger. Worry and relief.

For me, musically I have seen MANY different venues and met many great people. I opened myself up to playing ANYWHERE that called and for awhile it was great.

These days I am really particular about where I go.

To perform music as a career and for fun can be a struggle at times. Many times I would "forget where and who I was" if even for a few hours. That is what Bill was talking about when he said "getting lost and becoming a permanent resident".

I will never regret where I have been because all those roads have led me to now...and here.

I will tell you that coming home is wonderful... I have learned however, to FEAR never coming home....

It can be dark out there friends... and everyone longs for that front porch light to be on...somewhere in all our lives.

Jamie

Today I want to say thank you to all of you who saw more in me than I did all these years.
Thank you for never giving up… and always encouraging me.
Thank you for being there when I needed you. To pray with, complain, cry and laugh.
Thank you for seeing the positive when at times I could not see past the negative.
Thank you for the calls and emails… the cards and letters.
Thank you for the food, the beds, the $20 and more here and there!
How will I ever repay such kindness and giving?
How will I be able to prove to you just how thankful I am for you all?
All I know to do for now is sing and write in a manner that shows just how thankful I am.
Songs about gain and loss. Songs about uniting and leaving. Songs about doubt and assurance…pain and healing… fear and faith…
Songs about Marriages and Funerals… the pain of Divorce and the joy of starting over…
Songs about your life and mine…. Our secrets and our lies… our foolish boastings and our wise truths…
Songs about Love, Grace and Forgiveness.